


Easy To Love

by DefiFox



Category: League of Legends RPF
Genre: After Party, Alcohol, Boys In Love, Caring Humanoid, Carzzy deals with a shitfaced drunk boyfriend, Crying, Cuddles, Dancing, Drunk Humanoid, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, It's pretty sweet, Kissing, Like VERY sappy, M/M, Oblivious Carzzy, Sad bois, Sappy, Sick Carzzy, Some issues, Sweet, Teasing, Trust, Vulnerable Marek, Worried Humanoid
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-30
Updated: 2020-10-01
Packaged: 2021-03-01 03:46:51
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 12,847
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23398693
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DefiFox/pseuds/DefiFox
Summary: Matyáš and Marek fall in love, and it's oh so sweet. Sometimes, though, at least one of them is a complete dumbass.
Relationships: Marek "Humanoid" Brázda/Matyáš "Carzzy" Orság
Comments: 25
Kudos: 44





	1. I Really Didn't Notice

**Author's Note:**

> I have no idea how many chapters this will get, they can all be read as separate chapters but I'll do my best to keep everything chronological.  
> I hope you all enjoy this mess I've created! :D

Mac pinched the bridge of his nose with a sigh. ‘Guys, you’re really gonna have to step up your game if we want to win this weekend.’

Matyáš turned around on the couch to face his coach, completely unbothered by the massacre of a teamfight replaying on the television. ‘Come on, we already won against G2. We can handle Vitality and XL easily!’

‘Not with that attitude’, Mac said quietly as he watched his players chat and converse as they watched each other die. As per usual only Shadow was really paying attention. The young jungler was a gift to the team, adding to their style perfectly. Him and Kaiser had played together before joining MAD Lions and had a great synergy from day one. 

Mac supposed the rowdiness and brutality of his team came with the synergy and friendship that had been there since day one, so he’d tried hard to let everyone express themselves. Even Matyáš, regardless of how annoying he could be sometimes. 

As of now Matyáš was completely unaware of Mac’s pondering, testing the limits of Marek’s patience. ‘Marek Brázdaaaa..’ he said with a giggle as he stretched the letters for way too long. It earned him a cold glance.

He liked winding up Marek for reasons he couldn’t put into words. There was something about the way he looked just before he’d shove Matyáš right back, some air of confidence and bossiness that he had. Matyáš liked to bring that side out, because there were usually lots of jokes and memes following his actions right up.

It had become a sort of unspoken rule between the two of them that Matyáš would try to get Marek’s attention in as many ways as possible, usually by annoying the hell out of him. When Marek started returning the actions it all became playful very quickly. That wasn’t always for the better though, as the both of them tended to lose track of what was normal, like that one time they ended up smearing pizza toppings all over each other’s shirts and faces.

Matyáš tried to wind Marek up a few more times and in different ways, with no success. Annoyed at his friend’s behavior, Matyáš started pulling at his sleeves. At first Marek managed to ignore him, but the pulling got harder and harder until he couldn’t ignore it anymore. Matyáš grinned as he felt Marek respond, feeling muscles get tense under the shirt he was still holding onto. He made sure to pull a little harder, putting as much force as possible into it without destabilizing or making a fool out of himself. 

Matyáš was startled when a hand bigger than his grabbed his wrist. Marek’s fingers closed securely around his wrist, rendering him powerless. Matyáš winced at the sudden action. He might have gotten annoyed at the harsh treatment, were it not that he was completely frozen in place under Marek’s glare, pinning him down to the couch.

Matyáš didn’t move as his hand was plucked from the long-sleeved dark shirt that accentuated all Marek’s best parts so well. When Marek finally let his hand go, the first thing Matyáš noticed was the lack of warmth on his skin as a gush of cold wrapped around his hand.  
With an uncomfortable feeling he pulled back his hand and massaged it. It didn’t even hurt, but something felt off nonetheless. Matyáš was unsure of what had just happened or why Marek had reacted so strangely. Perhaps he’d accidentally crossed some boundary in his teasing and joking, or maybe Marek just wasn’t in the mood today. 

Marek sighed as he pulled himself out of his trance and turned back to the screen. He mumbled something and Matyáš had to make an effort to even be able to hear it.  
‘Otravné dítě’, Marek said under his breath. 

It wasn’t followed by anything, no playful tone, no smirk or wink or soft shove into the couch. Just an ice cold shard thrown at him like that.

Matyáš clasped his hands together in surprise. He knew Marek could get rough with him sometimes, he was used to it even, but he always stayed respectful. No dirty remarks under his breath, no false accusations, no cursing or calling names if it wasn’t in a playful manner.   
Matyáš had no idea why that would change now, but he wasn’t going to sulk over it for too long. Marek would come around and then they would talk about it, or not. Until then he wasn’t going to acknowledge that stinging in his heart.

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

After reviews some hours passed. Matyáš killed the time watching series and calling his family, not in the mood for playing. He’d wrestled his way through one game in which absolutely nothing went right and then decided it wasn’t for him right now. It was just a fluke, nothing else.

That’s what he told himself time and time again, but his eyes and heart said otherwise.  
Matyáš found himself staring at the television as an old movie played. It filled up the silence around him with gunshots and harsh words.  
It was a good movie, even one of his favorites. He knew almost every line and every detail by heart, but today he just couldn’t seem to focus on it. No matter how hard he tried to glue his eyes to the screen, every few minutes his eyes were pulled towards the door as his mind yearned to get out of this room. 

Something must be going in the room next to his, Matyáš knew. There surely was a reason Marek hadn’t come in yet, to explain what was going on or just to annoy him. Matyáš was often the evildoer, but Marek had his fair share of moments as well, walking into Matyáš’s room and demanding attention right-this-second. They hadn’t known each other for all that long, but people tend to grow on each other faster when they’re living and working together. 

At first they’d lived almost parallel lives, consciously keeping their paths as far apart as possible. Matyáš reasoned they were both just like that, feeling uncomfortable in the presence of someone they didn’t know.  
Sadly for both, they were living in the same apartment and it didn’t take long until they had their first team breakfast, which meant they did not only share a table, but were also placed next to each other. That shouldn’t really mean anything to Matyáš as he was used to eating breakfast alongside others like every human being is, but for some reason his eyes kept getting pulled towards the way Marek was carefully poking at his food. He joked about it and everyone got a good laugh out of it, something Matyáš liked to consider a win.   
But for some reason, something about Marek’s cautious smile made him feel like a champion.

His goal for the next weeks was set: make Marek smile. It was a task he was first hesitant to do, but before long he figured he’d just go about it like he did with everyone else. Matyáš treated his new target as a friend and pulled pranks and jokes on him like a brother. He soon found out that making Marek smile was one of the easiest things in the world, if he did everything right.

Days went by and Matyáš felt something change. Marek started being more open to his actions and went along with them more easily once Matyáš had broken through his little stone cold façade.  
Maybe Marek was getting used to this new person in his life the same way Matyáš had been getting used to him.

They had really only grown closer from that moment. It was something special to Matyáš to see that Marek not only liked the way he behaved around him, but also reciprocated it. He hadn’t found someone who got along with him so well since.. ever, really.

Marek felt like the piece of the puzzle that completed him, and that was something Matyáš had never felt with a person before. It felt amazing to be with someone so perfect for him that every other friendship seemed like a childhood’s affair. 

Matyáš felt drawn to Marek. Whenever, wherever he was, there was always something pulling him towards Marek. They were like magnets to Matyáš, always coming closer to each other. He was happy with that, the way they were together and the way they could never stay apart for longer than hours on a normal day. 

Matyáš always thought Marek felt the same way and had as much fun with Matyáš as he had with him. When Marek was annoyed, he’d always come back within the hour to talk things out. He was like that, thoughtful and responsible (when he wasn’t being a childlike idiot, at least). 

So why hadn’t he come yet? Maybe Matyáš had crossed a line he shouldn’t have, though he didn’t remember doing anything out of the ordinary. Something could be going on with Marek, gone completely unnoticed by his friends. Or maybe Matyáš was just reading too much into it. 

He tapped his fingers rapidly on his table, feeling the urge to do something arise in him. Man, being without Marek was boring. The movie had long ended and now he was staring at a black screen, waiting. He was unsure why he was doing this to himself, the endless waiting, when he could just get up and walk to Marek. 

Matyáš sighed and the tapping stopped. When he got up he felt his heart beat in his chest, but he pushed the feeling down. He wasn’t even sure what he was doing when he walked to the door, opened it and made a straight line for Marek’s. His mind was twirling with thoughts when he knocked and heard a mumbled ‘come in’.

Whatever Matyáš was expecting beforehand, it wasn’t a red-eyed Marek. The taller Czech was sitting on his bed, staring at the ground. He looked up when the door clicked shut behind Matyáš. 

‘Why are you here?’  
His voice was much softer and less steady than usual, even though he spoke the words with the same neutral face he always had. It just wasn’t as impressive now that it was accompanied by swollen eyes and a red nose.

The whole situation left Matyáš speechless for a while as he stood motionlessly in the room. His heart was pounding rapidly in his chest, fighting to overcome the wave of questions that rang through his head. Above everything else, he was just so confused. Matyáš had never seen Marek cry before, had never even seen him being down. 

He scraped his throat uncomfortably. ‘I-‘

‘Wait, don’t even say it. You want an apology.’   
Marek twiddled his thumbs, moving his gaze up and down from the ground to Matyáš.

Matyáš stammered out, ‘What?’

When Marek opened his mouth to repeat himself Matyáš cut him short. ‘No, I heard you.’   
He pulled a slightly shaking hand through his hair as he eyed Marek. ‘I was just.. I came in here to check if you were ok’, he said awkwardly. 

Marek huffed. ‘Oh, me? I’m great, you know.’ He looked up at Matyáš with a cold glare. ‘Never better.’

Matyáš put his arms over each other. He wasn’t used to looking down at Marek. For some reason it felt wrong. ‘Then why were you crying?’

‘Nothing you need to know’, Marek answered sharply. Every word he spoke felt like it was forced out of his throat as he tried to keep his cold demeanor.

This was so different from the Marek he knew. He was used to cold Marek, but that was usually just a mask to form a challenge to Matyáš. It wasn’t who Marek was, deep down. Matyáš narrowed his eyes, studying his friend intensely. He looked for anything, cracks on the smooth surface that weren’t from crying. When he was met with cold eyes, Matyáš sighed in despair. ‘You’re my friend, Marek. I’m worried about you!’ 

Something in Marek finally seemed to crack. He threw himself backwards on his bed, eyeing the white-painted walls behind Matyáš. The cold look was gone, but it left Marek looking so vulnerable, unlike Matyáš had seen before. There was something big going on inside Marek’s head, Matyáš could see it in his conflicted eyes.

He carefully took a step towards the bed, and another one when Marek didn’t respond until he was eye to eye with him. Matyáš sat down next to him. ‘You know you can tell me anything, right?’

Marek turned his head to look at Matyáš. His voice was shaking again when he answered. ‘Not if I want us to stay friends.’

Matyáš had to look away as he fought to keep his breath steady. His heart was thumping wildly inside his chest and his lungs were aching to scream. Every second he had to hear Marek being fragile like that felt like torture. But how the hell could he fix it?  
‘Well, unless you killed my family or something, I think we will still be friends’, he tried to half-joke.

Marek didn’t respond, just kept staring at Matyáš. The latter raised a brow. ‘Well, did you kill my family?’

‘No, I didn’t do that’, Marek said. The corners of his mouth were dragged upwards slightly, a movement so small that Matyáš almost didn’t notice it. But he did, and parts of him were reminded of all the smiles he’d seen before. ‘Well, then I don’t see the problem’, he managed to say with a light voice, like nothing was ever wrong in the first place.

Marek looked away from him. He tried to hide his shaking hands, but it was clear to Matyáš that he was fighting his tears. It was so strange to Matyáš that something could shake, calm, collected Marek so much. A part of him wanted to fight whatever made this happen.  
Eventually Marek sucked in a shaky breath and looked up, his eyes filled to the brim with tears. They glimmered in the light until he wiped them away with a clumsy hand.   
‘You are’, he whispered.

Matyáš clasped his hands together. ‘What, me? What have I done to you?’ he asked incredulously. He didn’t want to believe that. Sure, he knew he wasn’t a good person in particular, but he wouldn’t have done something so bad that it could set off Marek like this, or so he hoped. 

‘You haven’t done anything’, Marek said. Agitation mixed in with his shaking voice, the result sending shivers down Matyáš’s spine.

He looked at Marek with big eyes. This only got more and more confusing with each word he said. ‘Well then why would you be angry with me?’

In a rush Marek sat up. His shoulder just barely touched Matyáš as he sucked in his breath. His face was contorted with pent up frustration, fear and anger. ‘I’m not angry with you! I’m in love with you, you dumbass!’

That’s when it hit Matyáš hard. The cautiousness, the careful smiles. Always touching, shoving, punching each other. Wanting to be together, feeling a strong pull towards him whenever he wasn’t close to Marek. The nights spent thinking about him. Everything about them together, from the first day they’d met to their first win together, their first hugs.

It felt like his head was spinning out of control. He was dizzy, seeing stars as he struggled to understand. Everything might’ve made so much more sense if it wasn’t all crashing down on him at once. 

Matyáš only noticed he’d started crying when Marek’s voice got through to him, so fragile in the storm of his emotions. ‘Mati?’

He looked up to find Marek’s face hovering in front of his. His frustration seemed to have dissipated as his face perfectly reflected what was going on inside Matyáš. Everything was such a mix of emotions. He could see Marek’s lip tremble just the slightest bit, so red in his pale face. ‘Fuck,’ he said shakily, ‘how did I not notice?’

Marek sucked in a shallow breath. ‘Well, I didn’t exactly lead you on or anything’, he mumbled, closing his eyes. ‘I.. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you earlier. It just felt like such a stupid thing and I really wanted it gone.’

‘Can I kiss you?’ Matyáš asked with a trembling voice. It was nothing but a soft whisper but it had Marek looking up in a flash. Matyáš forced himself to keep looking, locking his eyes with Marek’s through the blur. He loved those eyes so much, he realized. He wasn’t sure if he ever wanted to look away again. 

‘You want to-?’ Marek choked, looking so confused. He was so sure he’d get turned down that this came as a complete shock to him. 

Looking at him, Matyáš nodded, forcing a little smile out of himself. He allowed himself to look at Marek’s lips, wonder what they would taste like. When his eyes trailed towards Marek’s eyes again he looked at him questioningly. 

Of course Marek nodded and Matyáš pressed his lips forward to meet his. Marek reciprocated in a slow, careful manner, making Matyáš yearn for every second he could get. He found himself gripping the hem of Marek’s shirt when they pulled back. 

Marek touched his lips in disbelief before looking up at Matyáš. The movement was endearingly cute and infinitely inviting to see. Unable to hold himself back, Matyáš stole a second, quick kiss from Marek, this time with a smile. 

Time moved slow after that. Marek grabbed his hand and Matyáš was startled when he realized how small his hand felt in Marek’s big one. Strangely, it felt great like that.

They didn’t talk much after that, instead opting to start playing together again. Just like they would before, they bantered and joked and annoyed each other, though this time something felt different. There was a fresh breeze floating through their relationship, clarifying all the uncertainties there were before. 

And a few days later, when Matyáš was poking fun at Marek again, there was no annoyance in sight. Just a slight smile and the feeling of a hand enclosing his own.


	2. Loving Easily

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Marek likes to think he’s in a pretty healthy relationship. Matyáš is a sweet boyfriend, but he can be such a dumbass sometimes. It's infuriating, but also kind of cute.

Some days are rainy in Berlin. Everything outside will turn grey and wet, like melancholic thoughts darkening a clear day. There are people outside, but none of them seem to want to be where they are. Everyone feels like getting inside and curling up with a good book or some movies. 

On this stormy, rainy day, Marek can feel himself get carried away by the sound of the wind. He’s frustrated. All he wanted was a to cuddle up with Matyáš for a good movie, but instead he’s sitting stone-faced in front of the window. Alone. 

Of course Matyáš had to go and do something idiotic. He’s the sweetest boyfriend in existence, but so very stubborn in his devotion to Marek. So much, even, that Marek would now apparently have to stop himself from voicing stupid desires. Like wanting an iced coffee with extra whipped cream. During this storm, when no one would go outside. It was a stupid idea, one that Matyáš would laugh about with him, promising him they’ll get it later. Right?

No. Somehow Matyáš managed to surprise him again with his unpredictability. The door had closed behind him before Marek could stop him. He wasn’t about to go outside into the rain, wearing nothing on his feet but socks. 

Stupid, stupid, stupid. He should never have said that. Even if some part of him loves Matyáš for all the crazy things he does, Marek knows this can’t end well. At best, Matyáš will be freezing when he gets back, soaking wet everywhere. Anything other than that… Well, he’s decided not to think about it.

Rain makes seconds blur into minutes. Marek is still sitting in the same place, unsure of how much time has passed when a door is thrown open and then closed. He turns around in an instant to see a blue pile of clothes dripping pool onto his floor. The pile moves to hold out a Starbucks cup, filled to the brim with cold deliciousness.

Marek takes the cup and places it quickly onto his desk as Matyáš’s head emerges from his coat. He looks like a soaked puppy, shaking and dripping all over. Unbothered by the stains he’s getting onto his clothes, Marek hurries to help Matyáš shed all but one layer of clothing. 

As Matyáš takes off his now transparent white shirt, Marek opens up his closet in search of something his stupid, impulsive boyfriend can wear. As his hands are working their way through hoodies and other things, Marek is definitely not eyeing Matyáš, who has grabbed a towel to dry his upper body. 

‘I got you your coffee’, Matyáš says proudly.

Marek turns around to throw a hoodie and grey sweatpants at him as he contemplates his reaction. He wants to get angry at Matyáš, but they both know he can’t. It’s the only reason Matyáš still pulls stuff like this on him. Because let’s face it, how could he ever be mad at that tantalizingly captivating face with eyes that can look up at him so lovingly, lips that practically invite him in?

‘I can see that’, Marek responds as he sits on his bed. He wants Matyáš in his arms right now, but he’s too stubborn to admit it. 

Matyáš pokes his head through the hoodie and looks at him curiously. ‘What, aren’t you happy? I thought you wanted coffee.”

‘Do you think this is about the coffee?’ Marek asks, voice heavy with emotion. ‘I was worried about you! Look at you, you’re all cold and pathetic. Why would you go through so much trouble for something that can wait?’

Something in Matyáš’s eyes turns a bit more serious. He joins Marek on the bed, careful not to make the bed wet with his still dripping hair. When Marek reaches his arm around Matyáš’s shoulder and pulls him closer he notices that his boyfriend is still shivering under his dry clothing. 

‘I’m sorry,’ Matyáš murmurs. He looks up at Marek with that one look that will always make Marek’s heart melt, especially alongside those heartfelt words. Matyáš means them, he is sorry to make Marek worried. But he would do something like this for him again in a heartbeat, because that’s just his way of loving. It’s gentle and sweet and joking and impulsive and idiotic, at times. 

‘It’s okay. I was worrying about you, but you’re here now. Come under the blankets with me’, Marek commands softly. 

‘Ooh, you’re getting dominant on me? Lucky for you I’m already wet as I can be’, Matyáš snorts. 

Marek sees Matyáš’s shining eyes and laughs as he pushes him down, onto the bed. ‘Might have to make use of that later’, he says playfully. With an adoring look on his face he plucks at the locks of hair that frame Matyáš’s face, still shining golden when they’re completely soaked. 

His movements are cut short by an arm that pulls him downwards. Marek giggles as he lets himself fall right on top of Matyáš, who groans underneath him. There’s no annoyance in his giggle though, which follows right after. ‘Get off of me, you heavy monkey’, Matyáš says with a whiny voice. 

‘Why? I like it here’, Marek responds. To prove his point he puts his arms around Matyáš, pulling their bodies even closer to each other. His heart jumps when he realizes Matyáš has stopped shivering. Heavy as Marek may be, he makes for a good blanket. 

Matyáš scoffs and rolls over, so they’re lying face to face on the mattress. ‘I’m not gonna carry you like I do in LEC’, he says dead-serious. Snuggling closer to Marek’s chest, he doesn’t wait for a response. He’s still cold, and his boyfriend is a living heat source. 

Marek carefully rests his head above Matyáš, making sure not to pull at his hair. His hands find their way under his hoodie where he starts rubbing them over his back at an attempt to warm him more. He’s startled when Matyáš does the same, except he puts his hands against Marek’s chest to warm himself, and Marek shivers at the cold touch. ‘Honestly, why the hell did you go outside?’

‘Because I love you, Marek Brázda.’

Marek laughs. At first the usage of his full name had been weird, even a bit annoying, but he has come to love the way Matyáš says it, the way it always leaves his mouth so light-heartedly and sincere. No one has ever been able to make him happy just by saying his full name. 

‘I love you too’, Marek says with a smile. He loves saying it, loves hearing the words roll from his lips and seeing Matyáš’s eyes look at him, drinking those words up and reflecting them with every action. Loving someone has never been so easy as it is with Matyáš.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please give me ideas for these two! Can be anything- from date ideas to dialogue!


	3. Sick Angel

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It doesn't really come as a surprise when Matyáš gets sick, but it still has Marek worried as hell.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy this little chapter in these trying times, drink lots and stay safe!
> 
> PS: this is not Matyáš having Corona, it's just a flu xD

The room is dimly lit when Marek enters , the creaking of the door closing behind him being the only sound. He’s struggling to keep a small tray balanced in his hands, filled with stuff as it is. 

A weak cough comes from under the blankets as he’s putting it down on the nightstand, being careful not to spill any of the tea. When he turns around to look at his boyfriend all he can see is his hair, as the rest of him is safely tucked away under multiple blankets of various sizes and colors.

Marek tentatively draws the blankets back a bit so he can see the upper part of Matyáš’s head. Placing a hand on his forehead to check up on his temperature, he asks: ‘How are you feeling, miláček?’

Matyáš groans in response. They both know he’s sick by his own mistake, but that doesn’t take away from the suffering he has to endure. He hates being stuck in bed, but he can’t do much else right now. Not when every cough feels like a small attack on his internal organs and light equals being stabbed right in the center of his brain. 

Marek has really been doing his best to take care of him as good as he can. Although he hoped it wouldn’t happen, he’d kind of seen this coming from the moment Matyáš came back from his coffee run soaked and shivering. 

‘I brought you some tea’, he says, nodding at the cup. ‘Better sit up for me or you won’t be able to drink it.’ 

‘I don’t wanna,’ Matyáš protests weakly. ‘It’s cold outside.’

Marek smiles as he brushes some hair out of Matyáš’s face. His forehead is sweaty. ‘Come on, don’t make me lift you up. I’d probably drop you as soon as I tried’, he half-jokes. 

Another groan escapes from Matyáš, but he does push himself up eventually. Marek quickly repositions all the blanket so that he won’t get cold. ‘There you go,’ he says as he hands Matyáš the cup. ‘Careful, it’s still hot.’

Matyáš tries to drink from it anyway, almost burns himself and threatens to spill all over himself. He puts the cup back on the nightstand. ‘I’ll drink that later’, he says, sucking in deep breaths to cool his mouth and trying to hold in coughs. ‘Wouldn’t want to spill tea all over my deathbed.’ 

‘Your deathbed?’ Marek asks incredulously, holding back smiles. 

Matyáš nods. ‘Being near you always makes me feel like dying’, he says jokingly.

Marek giggles. ‘Can I join you in your.. deathbed?’

‘You can always join me Marek’, Matyáš responds with a sappy voice. It sounds a little pathetic when he’s hoarse like this and coughs right after, but that’s probably why he said it in the first place. Matyáš shuffles aside to make place for Marek, who quickly joins him under the heap of blankets. 

It’s hot and sweaty, but quite frankly neither of them cares. Matyáš doesn’t even know what temperature he’s feeling anymore, as he’s freezing one minute and sweating the next, or even at the same time. All he knows is that he wants to be close to Marek, who feels like good things. Nothing special, nothing in particular, just.. good things. He likes those things.

Marek shifts a bit to lean over Matyáš and places a small kiss on his cheek. He debates licking him as a bit of a joke, but he knows it won’t set Matyáš off anymore as they’ve done much stranger things by now, and he doesn’t really want to get sick too. Instead he follows his actions up with more kisses, everywhere he can reach.

He’s on his way to place a second kiss on the tip of his nose when Matyáš catches his lips with his own. They kiss softly, sharing the sensation in a content silence. There’s no passionate spark behind it like there is usually: this is an exchange of love. Silent, warm, safe love.

They pull back at the same time and Marek takes a deep breath. His eyes find Matyáš, whose eyes are half-closed in satisfaction and sleepiness. ‘You tired?’ he murmurs softly. His hand finds Matyáš’s.

‘Mmmaybe’, Matyáš slurs. He doesn’t even try to keep his eyes open as he says it. The last time he felt so tired was during his attempt to stay awake for 72 hours. He ended up falling asleep after 40.

‘You should drink something first, then we can sleep for a bit.’ Marek helps Matyáš into a sitting position and wants to hand him the tea, but Matyáš shakes his head.

‘You try first. I don’t wanna burn my mouth.’

Marek giggles and takes a sip. It’s at a perfect temperature, though it’s starting to cool off quickly now. When Matyáš sees it’s all good to drink he snatches the cup from Marek’s hands and gulps everything down in a heartbeat. He likes to imagine he can still taste Marek in the tea, but the truth is he can’t taste much of anything.

When Matyáš is done he drops the cup into Marek’s hand and waits impatiently for him to put it down and lay down with him. He does and Matyáš snuggles closer against his boyfriend with a content sigh. 

Once Matyáš is asleep he stops coughing and groaning. His breath is still a bit uneven, but he looks a lot more peaceful now. For some reason the word innocent pops into Marek’s head and he smiles.

Marek enjoys the moment for as long as he can. He would stay here all day, but he’s promised Mac he would be at their next team meeting so they can prepare properly for playoffs.   
With a sigh he eventually disentangles himself from Matyáš’s clingy grasp, careful not to wake him. He securely tucks the blankets back in place until he notices something fall onto the ground. With a curious look he picks it up. 

Marek has no idea what to expect but he isn’t really surprised when he sees that it’s a plush animal, a golden lion roughly the size of his lower arm. He can’t help but smile at the chosen companion of his boyfriend. A lion, to keep him warm.. such a cutie.   
With slow, cautious movements Marek tucks it into Matyáš’s arms, so he can have something to hold in his absence. He hates having to leave, but work is calling and a sick boyfriend sadly doesn’t mean a day off in this office. 

Picking up the trey is a lot easier now that the cup is empty. Marek picks up two biscuits from the still filled plate and places them onto the nightstand in case Matyáš wakes up and feels hungry. He’ll have to refill the glass of water later.

After placing one last kiss on his forehead and making sure he won’t wake up, Marek makes his way out of the darkened room. In the hallway, he blinks against the bright light. 

As Marek is making his way towards the living room he passes Andrei, who smiles at him when he sees where he is coming from. He smiles back and softly says: ‘He’s asleep now.’

Andrei nods and they go their ways again. Marek puts away the tray in the kitchen and joins his team in the cozy living room. He’s the last to join and they start as soon as he sits.   
They talk about G2, their strategies and potential weaknesses. Normally Matyáš would have lots to say about this, Marek muses. He’d analyze every player accurately in a burst of coherent thoughts, add to Mac or Peter’s ideas and suggest changes and improvements. Matyáš loves the memes, but he loves playing the game right when it matters even more. The only moment he’s guaranteed to be serious is when preparing for big matches.

Marek is uncomfortably aware of the empty space next to him. His empty hand, his shoulder that he can move freely. He hasn’t been in a meeting without Matyáš in what feels like ages, but he knows it’s for the better. Especially with matches on the horizon, his sweet boyfriend should focus on recovering, not troubling his mind with strategies and problems. 

‘Are you still with us, Marek?’ 

Marek looks up to find Mac looking at him with raised eyebrows. He sighs, cursing at himself for letting his attention shift to something else. Then he looks up and nods at Mac, who smiles understandingly at him and continues talking. 

It’s hard to focus when he can hear Matyáš cough in the distance. At least, he thinks he can. Shit, did he refill Matyáš’s glass? What if he gets thirsty?   
Marek doesn’t want to fill his mind with one person right now. He’s doing something important, and even if he’s used to having Matyáš with him, he can survive on his own for a while. Regardless, thoughts keep flooding in and he can’t stop them. Every minute not spent together feels like an eternity spent on the wrong things.

Paying attention to all the topics seems impossible, but at the end Marek thinks he’s done a pretty good job. Throughout the meeting he’s nodded, responded and even suggested stuff, maybe even more than he usually would. It’s not bad, considering his attention was elsewhere most of the time. Now he’s out and finds himself nearly slamming doors as he practically sprints off towards Matyáš’s room.

When Marek opens the door he sees that nothing has changed. Matyáš is still asleep, the plush lion tucked safely in between his arms. Before joining them in the bed he tiptoes his way out of the room to refill Matyáš’s glass with water. 

After Marek has closed the door and taken off his jacket he can finally join Matyáš under the blankets. He tries to move as slowly, gently as possible, but when he removes the plush lion to take Matyáš in his arms himself, his eyes flutter open.

‘I missed you’, Matyáš murmurs. ‘Did everything go alright?’

Marek grins and places a kiss on Matyáš’s forehead. ‘Everything went great. Now go back to sleep, silly.’

For once Matyáš gives no response. When Marek hears his breath steady somewhat a few seconds later he listens to it closely. He had no idea that he could come to miss Matyáš so much in such a short time period. God, he’s glad to be back now. 

Matyáš looks peaceful. Sweaty and pale, but peaceful nonetheless. Marek adores watching him when he sleeps. It’s like all his demeanor, all his jokes, cockiness and idiocy fade to little stars twinkling in the distance, leaving an angel in their wake. Of course Matyáš is always an angel to Marek, but seeing him like this makes it all the more clear to him.

Marek softly traces his hand over Matyáš’s face, following the soft contours of his lips, jawbone and nose. He does it all with a smile gracing the edges of his lips. He’s dating an angel.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd love to hear any tips, thoughts or ideas! 
> 
> <3


	4. In The Blur Of The Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Set in Playoffs Week 1, 2020
> 
> MAD beat G2 and decide to have a little party, just their team. They all have a great time, but things are getting blurrier and blurrier for Marek. Maybe he's had a bit too much to drink...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm a bit unsure of the last part, because I think the style conflicts a bit with the rest of the chapter, but I do like it on its own so I've just decided to keep it in. I hope you enjoy, even though this one's a bit late compared to the actual date!
> 
> And also, thanks to Floraly for the story idea! It was a nice challenge to work it into this chapter :D

Marek likes to imagine that thousands of people are cheering for them when they beat G2. It feels good, but some kind of edge seems to be missing when there’s no crowd, no hyped up shoutcasters. There’s no real interview at the end, not one on a stage with a microphone, staring into a thousand cameras and invisible eyes. 

It’s all a lot more empty, but that does give him the opportunity to express his feelings and show them clearly. Hugs are and would always be shared all-around of course, but kissing on stage is considered a bit unusual. Here, no one really minds them when Matyáš flings himself at Marek. They share a short, sweet kiss, accompanied by the feeling of a hand sliding into Marek’s. 

They’re still embracing when someone scrapes his throat and look up when Mac starts talking. ‘Guys, that was amazing. There were mistakes here and there, but I’d say these were some of your best games yet. I’m thinking we can go through everything later, and just celebrate tonight. We’ll bring out some beer, order in some food and just have a little blast with each other. Sound good to you guys?’

Norman cheers and everyone laughs. They don’t need a crowd to have fun if they get to watch Norman get absolutely wasted and start acting like an even bigger goofball than he usually is. That, on top of having snacks and being with some of his best friends is practically a dream scenario. This is going to be a fun night, Marek decides with a smile. 

An hour later they’re all gathered in the living room watching the Joker for the millionth time, though it’s really only playing for background noise. Marek’s attention is mostly drawn to the wide array of foods and snacks spread out on the table, and of course Matyáš gets a share as well. As always they’re sitting close to each other, shoulders leaning into each other and occasionally sharing short kisses between them.

The beer has just started working its effects on Marek enough to blur reality a bit around the edges. Everything seems a lot more vivid, energetic. Matyáš’s face is glowing with cuteness when Marek feeds him another chicken nugget, careful not to get his fingers bitten off. He touches Matyáš’s lips on the way back and brings his fingers to his own lips, keeping his gaze locked on Matyáš. 

Matyáš, in return, takes a sip of his beer and leans forward to kiss Marek, who can still taste a tinge of the cold drink. It’s teasing at its finest, and Marek has been subjected to it ever since he got together with Matyáš. He locks his lips onto Matyáš’s and kisses him back passionately, trying to get more of the intensely good feeling that is taking him over. To his great disappointment, Matyáš pulls back way too quickly.

Matyáš seems to know what he’s doing to Marek as he takes another sip of his beer and eyes him playfully. The smile playing on his lips is one everyone in the house knows all too well, but it’s Marek who’s gotten to see it the most. He’s come to love and hate it in equal parts, but often love gets the upper hand, just as it does now. 

Marek places a small kiss on Matyáš’s cheek and follows it up with a quick, stealthy lick, making sure that no one notices but Matyáš. His boyfriend smiles and Marek looks up in surprise when he feels a hand creeping under his shirt.

Matyáš isn’t doing this just to touch him- no, as he starts to move his hand to the side, his intentions become crystal clear to Marek. He wants to push the hand away but is too late, as Matyáš is already furiously poking him in his sides. Marek squirms and tries not to fall of the couch or knock anything over as he wriggles in every direction. 

Andrei is looking at him with an amused smirk, but the rest isn’t even really paying attention to them. They’re used to this by now, so they all just shuffle aside and let Matyáš continue tormenting Marek. 

Matyáš is a cruel boyfriend, but luckily a merciful one as well. He relents after another minute of Marek squirming and cursing, looking up at him as if nothing has ever happened. His puppy eyes are just too cute- Marek can’t help but smile at him as he regains his breath.

Things kind of get blurry after that. Norman starts trying to juggle food at some point, but most of it ends up on his face or on the couch, to which he just laughs. He challenges everyone to a drinking contest and they all join in, even Shadow after a bit of coaxing and convincing.

Marek doesn’t really know how much he drinks, but it might very well be more than he’s ever had. The last time he got drunk at all was during New Year’s, a tumultuous time filled with emotions. Back then he was drinking to still his mind. Now, he’s drinking because he wants to and because it feels good to be with his people. They’re all joining him as he downs another pint, and another after that. Only Matyáš starts holding back a bit at some point, but all the others are too far gone to notice. 

It’s liberating to let go for once, surrounded by people he trusts. Matyáš is leaning against him as he cheers with Norman, encouraging Shadow and Andrei to finish their bottles. It’s a game Shadow wins with ease, to everyone’s surprise. They’ve always known him to be a careful guy, never one to give away control. This seems to be a new Shadow, but definitely one Marek can get used to.

Although he really enjoys watching his team go off like this and enjoying with them, Marek feels himself getting more and more tired. Everything is blurry and just listening to other people is starting to become a real challenge for him now. The day has been exhausting, and the late hours aren’t kind on him. It’s like his world is fading a bit, but he really doesn’t want to stop yet. Marek has no idea what time it is, but he does know that he’s enjoying himself way more than he has in a long time. 

All good things must come to an end, though. After a few more drinks and a short and unsuccessful game of “guess the champion”, Andrei announces that he’s going to bed. He’s shortly followed after the others, until Matyáš is also pulling at Marek to get up. 

Marek wants to comply, but finds his legs wobbly and unsteady underneath him, spinning along with the rest of the world. It’s a funny feeling, and somehow the stern look Matyáš tries to give him doesn’t help him get control back over his muscles. His boyfriend curses and helps him up with a lot of effort. ‘Here you go, you big idiot- Can you walk? Come on, let’s go to my room.’ 

They walk down the hallway like an elderly pair strolling down the park, or maybe like a soldier dragging his wounded mate back to base. It’s slow and seems like an endless effort to Marek, who’s struggling to see the floor under his feet. At first it’s pretty hilarious to hang onto Matyáš but soon Marek grows tired of it, and tired in general.

He’s startled when one of Matyáš’s hands disappears from his side, but after the soft click of a door and a pushing motion it’s right back to him, carefully guiding his tired body to the soft heaven that is a bed. 

‘I’m going to get some water, undress yourself in the meantime if you can’, Matyáš says softly. He’s being way too nice to Marek, who, underneath it all, can’t help but feel a bit ashamed at his situation.  
Marek stares at Matyáš’s receding back as he walks back into the hallway and disappears behind the wall. 

It takes him a while to realize he’s still staring and even longer to get back to himself. With a lot of effort Marek starts taking off his shoes and then he struggles his way out of his shirt. It takes him a hilariously long time.

Matyáš, who is standing in the doorway and watching this all unfold, smiles. It’s great to see Marek be the clumsy, failing one for once, when it’s a harmless situation like this one. There’s a kind of vulnerability in Marek’s eyes when he looks up though, that makes Matyáš rush towards him.

Marek doesn’t even notice Matyáš until he is right there next to him, helping him with his pants. Just like everything else right now, it takes an eternity, which is terrible because all Marek wants to do right now is throw himself onto the bed. 

When Marek is almost completely undressed Matyáš hands him the glass of water. Marek downs it in one go, just like he did with all his beer not too long ago. The world looks different now, though nothing has changed. Everything has quieted down and is darker, a welcome change to Matyáš’s tired eyes. He, too, just wants to get himself under those incredibly cozy blankets and be with his boyfriend.

He is about to when Marek pulls at his arm, not really something meant to stop Matyáš from getting in bed, just a gesture to get his attention. 

Marek looks up, eyes shining faintly in the dark. They’re mesmerizing, to the point where Matyáš has had to force himself too avert his eyes more than once when they’re talking. The hand around his arm loosens its grip, apologizing for its direct behavior. ‘Tell me a story.’

‘A story?’ Matyáš repeats incredulously. ‘It’s shit o’clock in the night, you’re shitfaced drunk and you want me to tell you a story?’

The hand recedes completely now, and Marek looks away. Matyáš realizes he’s reacted a bit too roughly. He can’t really help it though, considering he’s just treating Marek the way he normally would and there is no way to predict this newfound sensitivity when he gets drunk.

‘I’m sorry’, Matyáš says hurriedly. ‘Do you really want me to tell a story at this time? Wouldn’t you just prefer to go to sleep?’ He carefully brings his hand to his face, gently placing it on his cheek.

‘No’, Marek mumbles. ‘A story about love.’

Matyáš smiles. ‘Aww, that’s sweet. Do you want me to tell the story of.. Carzzy and Humanoid, the best mid-bot in the west? How they fell in love and-‘

His impressive saga is sadly interrupted by a pat on his arm and a soft whine. Giggling, Matyáš takes Marek’s hand in his own. He absently plays with it while he comes up with something; his mind is blurry too.

Finding a good way to start takes a while and shortly Matyáš wonders whether Marek will just fall asleep here and now. Marek’s eyes find his own every now and then, assuring Matyáš that he’s still awake. Everything feels distant to Matyáš, the cars that ride outside, the rain that’s starting to trickle down the window. It’s all dark, cold and blurry, which forms a perfect contrast with the warmth and feeling of clearness Matyáš experiences whenever his eyes meet Marek’s.

It’s like a soft spotlight is gently floating overhead, carefully casting them in a hazy light. It must be the moon, but it feels like a thousand fireflies are humming together, making sure no one is left out of their gentle love. Nothing has ever felt so wonderful, and Matyáš doubts if he’ll ever get to live in such a moment again.

It’s the dreamiest thing either of them has ever felt, and with a smile they realize they’re sharing this with each other. When the silence is humming with sweetness and the dark is cast alight by shining eyes, they feel closer to each other than ever. Matyáš closes his eyes, relishing this wonderful moment. 

Only when Marek taps on his arm is he brought back to reality, and with a soft voice he begins. 

‘Once upon a time..’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope y'all liked it! How's quarantine going, is everyone still ok? I'd love to hear from people!


	5. It's Nice Like This

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Matyáš helps Marek out by killing a spider, and proceeds to say something stupid.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really can't help myself. This chapter is set somewhere after 2020 Spring Playoffs, a few days after MAD's elimination. I've had this in my drafts for a bit, and I'm feeling myself get weak for these two dumbasses again. 
> 
> Also, thanks to Kuevi for the spider idea! It was a refreshing way to start a fic :D
> 
> I hope you enjoy reading!

‘Matii!’ A voice calls through the gaming house, startling Matyáš and distracting him from his phone. He looks up, trying to locate the origin of the sound. When he hears it again, Matyáš is sure that it comes from Marek’s room. With an untroubled sigh he gets up, suppressing a smile as he opens his door.

Marek is backed against a wall, looking at his bed with a grossed out, scared look. He looks behind him when Matyáš opens the door. ‘There’s a spider on my bed’, he says, eyes alight with horror. 

Matyáš grins. ‘A spider again? They do love your room, don’t they?’

Marek nods quickly and kisses Matyáš on his cheek before pushing him forward. It’s as much of a teasing gesture as it is an urgent request to help him out. Knowing that Marek feels uncomfortable exposing his fears like this, even when they’re completely normal, Matyáš hurries to get this over with.

Matyáš approaches the bed, not acknowledging the tingle in his stomach. It’s just a spider, nothing more. Shaking off the itchy feeling on his back, he starts moving the blankets around. Sure, Marek is the one who’s terrified of spiders, but that doesn’t mean Matyáš likes those creepy, long-legged, crawly beasts..

His breath is caught in his throat when Matyáš sees a flash of movement, something slips away just under his hand. He just barely manages to hold back a startled yelp that totally would have ruined his heroic performance. Annoyed, Matyáš reminds himself that he is not the one who called for help.

As he lifts the patch of blanket where the spider is hiding Matyáš realizes he has nothing to catch it with. He slowly drops the soft material, looking around him.   
Marek is still backed against the wall, his eyes urging Matyáš to go on. The desk is filled with things that are sweet, useful and completely worthless to him right now. Matyáš knows he has to use his shoe, of course he does. He just.. really doesn’t want to.

Matyáš stands still for a second, mustering up the will to go through with it. In his head, he can see himself becoming Spiderman after he fails to kill the spider and it jumps him. As good as it sounds to be a superhero like that, Matyáš knows it’s not for him, he doesn’t want it. He’s never really liked Spiderman, anyway. 

With one deep breath Matyáš takes off one of his shoes and slams it onto the spider, killing it immediately. Tension that he doesn’t want to admit was piling up in his body is released at once and he feels stupidly proud of himself. Matyáš turns around triumphantly, beaming at his boyfriend. Marek inches closer and hands him a tissue as he mumbles a soft ‘thank you’.

‘You’re welcome’, Matyáš responds coolly as he scoops up the spider and throws it in the trash. ‘I will gladly help my midlaner and boyfriend, who needs to be carried on and off the rift. Insecure and scared, right?’ Matyáš taunts playfully, the way he always does after lost games. 

Marek sits on his bed again, facing away from Matyáš. ‘Yeah,’ he mumbles, ‘thanks.’

Matyáš’s smile fades into a small frown as he considers what he just said. It’s not like Marek isn’t used to his teasing, at this point it makes up about half of all of his interactions with teammates. Matyáš enjoys taunting people, and his friends all handle it well, Marek most of all.

With a frown, Matyáš joins him on his bed. ‘That was just a joke, you know that.’  
He puts his hand on Marek’s shoulder, uncertain what to do. Marek isn’t pushing him away, that’s a good thing. Judging by his perfectly still posture he’s not crying either. Matyáš is a bit startled when Marek turns his head to face him.  
‘I know but, you’re right? I mean, I messed up right, and I should’ve been better. Not just this series, but I make so many mistakes. What am I doing here?’

Matyáš moves so he can sit in front of Marek, facing him. Carefully lifting his chin up, he looks deep into the eyes he loves more than anything. ‘Hey, that’s not true. What makes you think that?’

Shrugging hopelessly, Marek searches for the right words. There’s a short silence, filled by nothing but their breaths. 

‘I don’t know. There’s just things.. I can do so much better. This is my life and I am fucking it up, just like I fucked up with Kasper.’

The last words hit both of them like a truck. Marek has never really felt comfortably to share the nature of his relationship with Kasper but if it wasn’t clear before, it surely is now. Matyáš sighs, pulling Marek into a warm embrace. He wants nothing more than to wipe all of his insecurities away.

‘I’m sorry’, Marek mumbles eventually. ‘I shouldn’t have said that. My life is not your responsibility and me and Kasper are over now, I’m done with him.’  
He pulls back a little, but Matyáš isn’t ready to let him go yet.

‘No, Marek. I want to help you with things. You always help me if I’m down, and I want to return that. I was stupid to make that joke because it’s not true and you deserve way better, but you need to know I’m here for you.’ 

Matyáš wants to say so much more, voice the waves of shame that are washing over him. He’s seen so many signs that Marek struggles sometimes, but he’s always chosen to ignore it. Somehow he always managed to convince himself that Marek is fine, Marek is invincible.   
Matyáš really should’ve known better. 

Forcing himself to sit still, Matyáš can hear Marek breathing deeply in front of him. Carefully, he climbs into his lap. ‘I’m here’, he repeats, and he can slowly feel Marek start to relax.  
Matyáš takes Marek’s hands in his own and puts them around his face, cupping his cheeks. Then, he reaches out and slowly brings Marek’s face closer to his own. 

Marek goes along, moving closer by himself. He moves one of his hands behind head and their lips meet in a soft, slow kiss. It may be more than a kiss, a consolation, a promise: to be there and to be together. 

They barely move for a long time, as their lips slowly meet each other again and again. Their kiss is light like the rustling of leaves over each other on a forlorn tree, yet resilient like its steady roots. It’s something Matyáš never wants to stop doing even as he’s getting light-headed and his heart is pounding in his chest. 

When Marek finally moves back, he does so with a different look in his eyes. His one hand is still cupping and thumbing Matyáš’s cheek and jaw and with the other he takes one of Matyáš’s hands.   
He looks less lost, Matyáš guesses. He finds he’s repeating himself a lot, but he can’t refrain himself from whispering ‘I’m here’ one more time, now as he’s staring into Marek’s eyes.

A hesitant smile appears on Marek’s face. ‘I know,’ he says, ‘you always are.’  
There’s no sarcasm to his voice and Matyáš knows that Marek believes what he says. It makes his heart jump in his chest, to know that being forgiven can be so easy. 

They share a minute of silence. Matyáš uses it to make his thoughts a bit more cohesive, and to consider the things his stupid brain is only now starting to understand. How he managed to be such an idiot is a complete mystery to him. 

‘Marek?’ He says it with a small voice, trying to stop hiding in the silence and put himself out there.   
Marek looks at him and Matyáš is reminded of how close they are when he can see every detail of his face as it contorts into a questioning look. ‘Mmm?’

He takes a deep breath. There’s always a mental barrier when he wants to say something serious, something sensitive. It makes Matyáš feel vulnerable, makes him scared he’ll be called out on it. It’s a reason he tends to keep his issues to himself, he always has. ‘I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you,’ he blurts out. ‘I should have been, it was stupid, because I should have known that you were.. that.. that you were not okay. But I didn’t help you, instead, I only made it worse with my jokes and stupid things.’

Matyáš looks away after that. He’s not afraid of being blamed, he’s terrified of it. Apologizing has never been a strong suit of his and doing it makes him feel so exposed, so alone in the world. Depending on someone’s decision to forgive him or not; it’s far from something Matyáš loves to do.

Marek stays quiet. Eventually, Matyáš musters up the courage to look at him. When he looks Marek in the eye, he sees nothing but understanding, a little sadness, and a lot of amusement in the eyes of the man he loves. Accompanying his eyes, a small smile is also ghosting along the edges of his mouth. It’s a small sign, but the past few months Matyáš has become a master of recognizing those things.   
Relieved, he sighs. He’s a little curious about why Marek is smiling, but surely he’ll be told soon.

‘Miláček, you could never make things worse for me.’   
Marek’s hands pull him closer and into a comfortable hug as he speaks, and Matyáš tries not to get lost in the sound of his heartbeat as he listens.   
‘I love that you worry about me, but it’s really okay. Sometimes I get down and I need a little cheering up, but you’ve always done that. I’m not perfect and you’re not perfect, I know that. But you, you’re perfect for me.’

Matyáš is happy he can hide his blush away in their hug, his face still pressed against Marek’s soft clothes. He breathes in deeply as he tries not to get overwhelmed by the emotions flooding his system.   
Marek’s been getting more and more comfortable to express himself since they’ve been together, but never in a thousand years did Matyáš expect something so pure like this. He smiles and sniffs as he leans back to look at Marek. 

‘That.. thank you’, Matyáš says, and then: ‘I love you.’  
Marek’s eyes are shining so bright now they’re filled with emotions, and his lips look as inviting as they always have. When he sees them curved into that sweet smile, Matyáš can only think those three words, that have been slipping over his lips so easily these days.   
Just for good measure, he says it again. ‘I love you.’ 

Marek’s smile broadens and maybe the heavens open a little when he does. His hands find Matyáš’s lips and gently stroke them, making him blush like a little kid. Matyáš looks away and up again, unsure what to do now. He feels as amazed by everything as if it was his first time, as if he’s never loved before.   
It confuses him, but Marek is there to help, luckily. For the second time in a short period of time their lips meet, with the confidence and experience of a weathered tree growing its leaves again. 

Matyáš closes his eyes and allows himself to get lost in the moment. Their kiss is more energetic this time, more vital.   
When Marek pulls back, Matyáš keeps his eyes closed. He wants to hold onto that tingle of his lips, that feeling of euphoria just a little longer. Besides, he’s still trying to wrap his mind around what happened minutes ago. It really shouldn’t mean much, but the trust and love Marek expressed so easily is something that hit Matyáš like a truck.

A soft murmur drags him away from his thoughts. ‘I love you too’, Marek says with twinkling eyes. ‘I love you so much.’   
He slowly lets himself fall onto the bed, until he’s laying with Matyáš in his arms. ‘We always end up in a bed, don’t we?’ he says, smiling. ‘Not that I mind.’

‘I guess we do, yeah.’ Matyáš responds with a smile. His voice is reduced to barely more than a whisper, but up so close he could mouth the words and Marek would hear them. 

Matyáš relaxes his muscles and allows himself to get carried away by the steady beat of Marek’s heart. He wants to stay in this warm, safe place forever.   
‘It’s nice like this’, Marek remarks.

Matyáš sighs a content sigh and agrees with his boyfriend. ‘It’s nice like this.’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you liked this chapter!  
> If you have any tips or suggestions on what the boys could go through or do next, please let me know!
> 
> Thanks :D


	6. Out In The Cold

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maybe the rain will wash away all his worries. Marek doubts it. Still, it's better than going back inside and facing the inevitable.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Who wants to cry with me about MAD? I'm going to go cry about MAD. 
> 
> Though their Worlds run ended before it could really even begin, I'm still incredibly proud of the players. This is just me coping with the fact that I won't be seeing them for months.

Rain batters down against the window. It’s come with the setting of the sun and has accompanied the rise of the dark. Marek shouldn’t be awake at these hours.

He listens numbly to the repetitive sounds around him. The rain, Matyáš’ soft snores, the consistent throbbing of his head. Everything mixes together and yet it is still too quiet to drown out his thoughts. They’ve been battering at his conscious for days, but have grown monstrous after their loss. It feels more like his thoughts are drowning him, if anything.

Allowing a soft sigh to escape from his lips, he shortly glances down at Matyáš in the dark. The boy’s hair is disheveled, and he still sniffs every now and again, though the tears have long dried by now. He didn’t take the loss easy. None of the team did, but Matyáš’ grief hit Marek like a bullet right in his heart. He could have prevented that.

Untangling himself from the embrace of Matyáš and the blankets proves a difficult task, but Marek has more time than he wants and a few minutes later he’s shivering in the outside air, looking out over Shanghai in nothing but shorts and a shirt that are getting soaked rapidly. 

The balcony provides him with a nice view of the city’s vibrant night life, even if somewhat dimmed by the ongoing pandemic. Looking down from the fourth floor he can vaguely make out people, walking alone or in small groups, or hand in hand with their partner. People walking everywhere and nowhere, engaged in social life like any other night. And what a social life it is. There’s a myriad of bars and clubs in only in Marek’s line of vision, and so many unexplored streets beyond that. Dozens of small restaurants with unique dishes waiting to be discovered and kind staff with limited English always making sure you’re comfortable. He promised Matyáš they’d visit tons of them together.

Back in Berlin, they both picked places they wanted to visit in the city on some of their days off. They would hire a taxi driver and wander around like regular tourists for one day, without a worry on their mind. There were many things to do and many more to see, and he’s promised Matyáš that they’ll go everywhere. 

Marek laughs bitterly. What beautiful lies to believe. Maybe he should have learnt last year that moments aren’t meant to be spent looking forward to the things that are to come. That they’re best spent living and enjoying, regardless of dreams and promises. Otherwise they’ll be gone before you know it, reduced to fleeting memories tanged with a bitterness only loneliness can bring forth. 

Last year has taught him that. It’s taught him what will happen next when he gets back inside. Those sweet words Matyáš whispers to him on bad days, the cheeky smiles and endless fun he pokes at him will come to an end. Once again, Marek will lose the warmth he’s allowed himself to get used to. It feels nothing short of inevitable.

Something rumbles overhead. Marek gazes upwards, feeling the rain batter down on his freezing skin and dripping down the sides of his face. The clouds are gathering, preparing for their final release. Figures on the street start rushing as well, afraid that even their umbrellas might not be enough to protect them for what’s to come. Marek watches with dimmed interest. His mind has flown elsewhere.

The squeaking of the door has him looking over his shoulder. Matyáš stands in the doorway, furiously rubbing in his eyes. “Come inside, Marek”, he pleads with an unusually sullen voice.

Marek stares at him. “You should be in bed. It’s cold out.”

“Yeah, well,” Matyáš starts, leaning against the door frame, “I know that. But I have a dumb boyfriend who likes to stand in the freezing rain in the middle of the night.” There’s not a trace of his usual playfulness. His voice is loaded with worry and sounds close to breaking.

Marek doesn’t respond. There’s not a single cell in his body that’s not at war with itself. He wants to stay outside, let the rain and guilt batter away at him until he’s numb enough to accept what comes next. His body is also desperately in need of warmth, and he really doesn’t want to let Matyáš down any more than he already has. In the end, it’s Matyáš’ words that convince him.

“Please come back inside, miláček. You’re going to get sick like this.” 

He only notices how irritated his skin is when Matyáš tentatively places a hand on his arm, guiding him back inside. It burns and prickles at the warm, dry touch, but not unpleasantly so. What’s unpleasant is the lump in his throat, making each swallow a little bit harder. At some point he won’t be able to hide that from Matyáš.

Marek doesn’t say a word as Matyáš opens and closes doors around them, until they’re both standing in the bathroom, blinking furiously against the painfully bright sterile lights. 

“Raise your arms”, his boyfriend commands. Marek obliges and watches on as his clothing is peeled off of him. He shudders at every touch of warm hands against his cool skin, until he’s enveloped in a gentle hug. Reluctantly, he puts his arms around Matyáš’ waist as well. 

He’s itching to give in to the tempting voice in his head, telling him that things will work out. Matyáš is here, isn’t he? He didn’t turn around and keep sleeping when he noticed Marek’s disappearance, but came look for him. 

Still, it feels impossible. Marek’s stomach coils in horror only thinking about what’s next, and he just can’t give himself false hope. Just because Matyáš is here now, doesn’t mean he will be in a week or two. They might just as well be strangers by then.

He won’t meet Matyáš’ eyes as the younger Czech steps backwards. “Why did you go out there?”

Marek sighs. Guilt eats at him from the inside and he’s torn, torn about what to do and what to say, now that he’s being forced back into the love he fears will choke him. A small sob swells in his throat, but he pushes it down. “I wanted to clear my mind.”

They both know that’s not an answer, but for once Matyáš doesn’t comment on it. He turns on the shower. “You should take a shower before we get back to bed. It will make you feel better.”

Murmuring an unclear affirmation, Marek steps under the warm streams of water. Matyáš is right- it does make him feel better in a way. The water burns pleasantly on his cold skin and warms him up a little on the inside as well as the outside. 

Matyáš doesn’t move until he’s done showering and has dried himself off. He’s trying hard to give him some time and space, even if he probably needs the opposite right now. Maybe it’s his way of an apology, but Marek can’t fathom why he’d feel the need to apologize for anything. 

Under Matyáš’ watchful gaze he sits on the bed, upper body resting against the headboard. They sit for a while, neither of them saying anything. Marek feels like he should speak up about something, offer up his apologies or try to explain himself, or even just make sure that Mati is ok.

In the end it’s Matyáš that breaks the silence. “I know that look, miláček. You’re worrying about things.”

Marek shuffles around in the bed as his stomach twists uncomfortably, but it can’t seem to settle. Is there a world where this doesn’t end in tears?  
A soft hand reassuringly squeezes his shoulder. “You can tell me anything, Marek. Or we can just sit here. I’m here for you too, you remember?”

An unexpected sad smile comes to rest on his face as Marek nods. Uneasily, he draws a long breath to say something- to thank Matyáš, or say words that mean nothing. The lump in his throat cuts him off before he can even begin, but maybe that’s okay. Matyáš seems to understand, anyway. 

“It’s alright. I get it,” he whispers, “I know how you feel. But I’m not leaving you, okay? Not any time soon.” And the arm slung around Marek’s shoulders, pulling him closer to Matyáš and under the blankets when he whimpers involuntarily, is surely there to prove it.

Minutes pass as neither of them moves. They’ve found a wistful kind of peace, a perfect ground to process their feelings together, without pushing each other. 

But even if Matyáš has stopped speaking all together, his alert eyes are a clear sign that he’s here, and not about to go anywhere. Marek snuggles a little deeper into their embrace, letting his boyfriend take care of him this time. Maybe he was wrong, but he feels that might be too early to say.

Matyáš is here now, though. He’s here, and he will be the entire night. The cold, unwelcoming world can wait. Marek still has a home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hehe, I'm a sucker for happy endings. Or, you know, somewhat positive endings. 
> 
> Any comments and kudo's are greatly appreciated!


	7. Twirling 'Round

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Packing stuff on your own is boring. It's better to have a boyfriend there for entertainment purposes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't mind the fact that I haven't reread this or edited all too much, and that it completely contrasts with the last chapter :D

The old songs playing on a brand new speaker fill Marek’s room with happy sounds as he’s packing his bags. He whistles along with them happily, though he’s not entirely sure what they’re saying. It’s one of Spotify’s standard playlists, filled with up-beat, cheerful songs. Perfect for this moment.

Matyáš is sprawled out over the bed next to his clothes, watching him pack. His bags are already in the hallway and now he’s here to “help” Marek pack his own things.  
In reality, he’s just scrolling on his phone and teasing the hell out of Marek’s choice of clothes. Matyáš is never much of a real help with things like these and Marek expected nothing more from him when he came strolling into his room. It’s always nice having the company of your favorite person, though.

“I don’t understand how you have so little hoodies”, Matyáš complains as he looks at Marek’s small pile of clothes. Following his look, Marek notes that it’s a lot smaller than at the start of the split. At least half of them seem to have disappeared mysteriously. “Like, are you even a gamer if you don’t have at least five hoodies?”

Matyáš eyes are innocent as he speaks, but looks truly are deceiving in this relationship. “Maybe,” Marek starts with a grin, “I’d have more hoodies if you didn’t steal all of them.”  
He keeps packing while he speaks, neatly folding another set of sweatpants and pretending not to see Matyáš’s indignant expression. Or the black hoodie he’s wearing, that looks a suspicious amount like one of his own that disappeared a while ago. It’s too big on Matyáš, but only a little, so he can always claim he just likes his hoodies oversized if Marek or anyone else accuses him.

Swaying to the beat of a new song coming on, Marek purposely ignores Matyáš’s scoffing and complaining. It’s too good of a day to let all those bad vibes way him down, anyway.  
“I would never do such a thing!” he mimics his boyfriend, who’s glaring at him from the bed. Marek giggles and blows him a kiss. 

When Matyáš doesn’t move Marek starts giggling even more and he stops packing for a bit. He gets on the bed and moves towards his pouting boyfriend, grabbing his arm. “You can always take my hoodies, babe”, he says with a grin.   
It really never has bothered Marek. On the contrary, he thinks it’s adorable to see Matyáš in his hoodies, or noticing him sneak into his room when he thinks Marek isn’t paying attention. Even now he adores seeing Matyáš almost disappear in his hoodie as he moves closer towards him. His face is a pale spot in a mess of black and grey fabric. It’s adorable. 

“Mmm, good. You couldn’t stop me if you tried, anyway.”

Marek quirks an eyebrow. “You think so?”

“Mm-hmm”, he hears Matyáš say confidently. Marek pulls the hood back over his boyfriend’s fluffy hair and smiles apologetically when he has to blink to let his eyes adjust to the light. He looks a little like he does in the mornings, with his hair messed up and a slightly groggy look. But he’s not sleepy, or doesn’t appear to be.

“Well, if you say so.. I mean, I could always just start tickling you?”  
Marek lets his hand hover above Matyáš’s waist, moving it down a little playfully. His fingers ghost along the edges of the hoodie, barely touching. He knows how vulnerable Matyáš is there, and loves to exploit that at times. 

Matyáš makes a pouty face at him. “You wouldn’t do that to me, right?”

The pouty face has always worked so well on Marek. With a grin he drops his hand to rest it gently on Matyáš’s hip, slowly massaging it. “Never.”

Matyáš shoots a shining smile at him. He looks adorable, hair messed up and rough, his attention fully focused on Marek. 

Just now a song starts playing, an up-beat catchy classic. Marek has heard it before in many places, but he just can’t seem to remember the name.   
Impulsively he gets up, holding up his hand invitingly to Matyáš. Shooting him a quick wink he says, “Want to dance with me?”

Matyáš looks at him unbelievingly. “You want to dance?”

He doesn’t look like he thinks it’s a bad idea, despite the questioning look on his face. So, Marek nods enthusiastically.  
“Yeah, why not?”

Nodding, Matyáš allows Marek to pull him to his feet. “Sure, why not”, he repeats with a grin.  
They start shuffling a little, experimentally moving their bodies in sync with the beat. It’s pretty clear neither of them know what they’re doing, but Marek doesn’t mind failing at dancing when he can watch Matyáš go down just as hard.   
Their love, he thinks with a smile, is built as much upon mutual embarrassment as it is on trust and loyalty. 

When an idea pops into his mind, Marek takes one of Matyáš’s hands in his. Matyáš raises his eyebrows at him. He yelps when Marek lifts their hands above their heads and gives him a push with his free hand, making him twirl.   
Marek giggles freely as he continues to spin Matyáš around, the latter just barely keeping upright. He likes it, though, especially when Marek stops motioning him on and catches him in his arms.

A little breathlessly Marek lets his eyes wander over Matyáš’s body, up to his face. They’re both panting a little, Matyáš more so than Marek. “I don’t get how dancers do this thing voluntarily”, Matyáš remarks with a grin.

“I’d dance with you again voluntarily.”   
Marek finds himself staring into Matyáš’s eyes when he says it, an enchanted smile playing on his lips. Damn those two eyes, each so amazingly beautiful on its own. The overwhelming greys and those little specks of green hiding in the shadows. They always make Marek feel giddy and lovestruck like a 12 year old girl crushing on Harry Styles. 

“Hmmm, you know what you can do?”  
Matyáš leans in a little closer, his lips brushing Marek’s ear. “Kiss me.”

There’s really nothing Marek can say to that, even if he wanted to. He obliges happily, pressing his lips down onto Matyáš’s. 

There’s something a little bit magical about those breathy kisses, when you’re both just a little out of breath. There’s still music playing on the background, but Marek feels his body relax as his lips move rhythmically with Matyáš’. Dancing might not be their thing, but they know how to move to a rhythm all right.

They break away with a smile, and Marek pulls Matyáš against his chest. He’s going to miss this when he’s home, alone again like many nights in the past few years. Marek fears he’s forgotten how to be alone, without a constant reminder of the good things.   
But those are problems for later. For now, he has all he needs right here in his arms.


End file.
